If boys will be boys…

If boys will be boys…

One of the inspirational women that I met in America last month recently drew my attention to this article.

I encourage you to follow the link above and read it, and I’m actually encouraging a lot of people to do the same.

Because, wow, is this true.

And it really needs to be heard.

Because this is where our talk gets real. And our faith gets lived out. And we really see the higher standard of purity that our Heavenly Father calls us to.

And we see why He does.

And what’s written here is beautifully true. Beautifully worded and full of a restoring reality that I want to share with others.

More than I do.

It’s also hard hitting. Because none of us are immune from the challenge and the experiences and maybe even the pain of this issue.

None of us.

Men and women. Boys and girls. Abused and abuser. Exploited and powerful.

Every single human heart who wars to stand for the purity that is spoken about in Scripture and who strives to work out what that even looks like.

Every single human heart that asks ‘how far is too far’ in regards to what we let our eyes view and our ears hear and our hands and feet experience.

And every single human heart that has failed, and come to Jesus in repentant tears saying, ‘I choose You. But I need You to help me love You and live for You as I should’.


Because truthfully, I meet young women every day who think they are garbage.



And I meet young men every day who think that the women in their lives are garbage.



And maybe they’d never say it in so many words.

Or maybe they would.

But in their actions they display their heart. And when they objectify those they are meant to treasure, and lust after those they were meant to love, and force those they were meant to defend… We have a problem.

A sin problem.

A human problem.

When we justify pornography as an acceptable, not just on the top shelves or adult-only websites, but through our pop videos and teenage magazines. When we allow our children to happily sing along to the crude lyrics in our iTunes top 10 and don’t guard their hearts or teach them how to. When we tell our girls that they have to ‘kiss a lot of frogs to find their prince’ and don’t teach them the God-given gifts of modesty and purity that protect their self-worth… We have a problem.

A sin problem.

A human problem.

And when men think wrongly of women, because they really think wrongly of themselves, because they really think wrongly of God… We have a problem. Just like when women think wrongly of men, because they really think wrongly of themselves, because they really think wrongly of God… We have a problem.

A sin problem.

A human problem.

When the prevailing thinking is boys will be boys – girls will be garbage. And that is never the heart of God.

Because this is a problem.

Our problem.

Rooted in the fact that we ALL need a Saviour. A Restorer. And a Healer.


Because when it comes down to it we all can feel like garbage.



Until the redeeming power that is only found in the precious-spilt-blood of the perfect-beautiful-God-man-Jesus, washes over us, and wipes our past clean, and clothes us in righteousness, and gives us a hope and a dignity for today, tomorrow and every day to come.

Because I know I’ve been there. Letting culture tell me that purity isn’t worth fighting for and in that, letting myself believe that I am not worth fighting for. I’ve felt the effects. I’ve been broken down, and beaten up, and spat out by the lies of the enemy, until I came through the experiences of life and really, really realised that the One who had always loved me, and always fought for me, and always treasured me, was the One who would now heal me, and restore me, and pursue me. My Father. My Saviour. My Healer.

Yesterday I spent the afternoon with a young woman who was so, so broken by life. And she told me that she was worthless. Her last two ‘boyfriends’ had left her black and blue on more than just her flesh, and the scars in her life ran deeper than the outward marks. She told me that she didn’t know if she’d make it through this time. She told me that men just used her for sex that she didn’t even enjoy. She told me that she had no hope. She asked me why if there was a God and if He loved her would He keep letting these things happen to her and why would He let her hate herself so much.’

‘Why would your God love someone like me?’

And as I held her tiny frame and soothed her tears, I could only let my heart break with hers, knowing that our Father’s heart already did.

But I could give her hope.

‘Because sweet, sweet girl. That was never the heart of God. And He doesn’t treat you like you’ve been treated. And He doesn’t condemn you. And He doesn’t leave you. And you are worth more to Him than you know. And He doesn’t love you because of what you have or haven’t done for Him, He loves you because you are the precious daughter of His heart, and the treasured beauty of Your Father. And my God would love someone like you, because He loved someone like me. And I may not have walked where you have walked, but I have walked my own story and I have known Him as Healer. And if He loved me in my pain, through my pain, and out of my pain, then He can do the same for you’.

And as my heart broke over this precious child of God, I remembered the women that Jesus had restored. The outcast. The abandoned. The abused. The adultress. The harlot. The poor. The widow. The weak.

And I had hope.

Praise a God who loves us with a mercy we don’t deserve, into a freedom we don’t earn, for a redeemed future of restored purity. Only Jesus.


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